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I asked my friend: “When I feel stupid what could I do?”

Answers from Elena Ornig

Her answer was loud and clear!

WHEN YOU FEEL STUPID, READ THIS!
You’ll feel much better after this….
and then read it again; you’ll begin to think you’re a genius.

Answer #1

(On September 17, 1994, Alabama’s Heather Whitestone was selected as Miss America 1995.)
Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
Answer: “I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever,”
–Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest.

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Answer #2

“Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can’t help but cry. I mean I’d love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff.”
Mariah Carey

 

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Unthinkable Answer

 

“Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life,”
Said Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign.

 

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Winston Bennett

 

“I’ve never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body.”
Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.

 

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Not Really Smart

 

“Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country,”
Mayor Marion Barry, Washington DC.

 

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Not Smart Answer

 

“That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I’m just the one to do it,” said a congressional candidate in Texas.

 

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Danny Ozark

 

“Half this game is ninety percent mental.”
Philadelphia Phillies manager – Danny Ozark.

 

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Al Gore

 

“It isn’t pollution that’s harming the environment. It’s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.”
Al Gore, Vice President of the USA.

 

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Answers

 

“I love  California. I practically grew up in  Phoenix,” manifested Dan Quayle.

 

 

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Seriously?

 

“We’ve got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?”
Lee Iacocca

 

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Football Genious

 

“The word “genius” isn’t applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.”
Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst.

 

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COLONEL

 

“We don’t necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people.”
Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor.

 

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Food Stamps

 

“Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances.”
Department of Social Services, Greenville, South Carolina.

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AND THIS IS MY FAVORITE!

“Traditionally, most of Australia ‘s imports come from overseas.”
Keppel Enderbery

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Written by Elena Ornig

Managing Director of Publishing Company "Julia Sophistique Pty Ltd". Committee member of Australian Computer Association GC Chapter. Member of Institute of Electrical and Electronics Engineers (IEEE). Member of the Chamber of Commerce & Industry Queensland. Member of the IT Forum Gold Coast. Sponsor of the Helensvale Writers' Group, Gold Coast. Committee member of the Gold Coast Writers Association Honored VIP Member of STANFORD WHO'S WHO in America. Publisher, writer and blogger.

Website: http://www.elenaornig.com/